By Jack Perry
Remember the American Dream? Americans used to believe that anyone, no matter how humble his or her beginnings, through determination and courage, could attain prosperity. After World War II, in the final heyday of the American Dream, a new generation felt as if they were entitled by birth to many things that their forebears earned by dint of hard work and sacrifice. The Declaration of Independence’s promise of the inalienable rights of “life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness” came to mean for many a guarantee – without cost – that each individual had a right to whatever pleased him or her,
Confusing rights with privileges has lead to a decaying society, a narcissistic culture in which an individual’s needs and pleasures are preeminent. A sense that our personal feelings and beliefs are more important than the rights of others, even than the rule of law, leads to a spectrum of societal problems, from college students stealing music off the Internet because they feel it’s their right, to widespread corporate malfeasance where criminals steal billions out of a sense of entitlement to ever-greater power and prestige. When we believe we are smarter than some laws, heedless of widely accepted values that hold our society together and ignorant of or unconcerned about the sacrifices others made to bring us the privileges we see as our rights, the American Dream becomes a nightmare.
The good news is that a new American Dream appears to be emerging from the wreckage of the old one. In this vision, greater responsibility and accountability for ourselves and others replaces the idea that life owes us whatever we please. Additionally, it’s becoming clearer that, as John F. Kennedy said, “For of those to whom much is given, much is required.”
You will find that feeling an “attitude of gratitude,” experiencing privileges as privileges instead of as what you deserve, leads to still greater abundance and opportunity in your life. In personal terms and as a part of an organization, you will discover greater creativity, greater energy, and greater returns on whatever you invest yourself in.
Try these steps to start yourself along the path to a new and more fulfilling American Dream:
1. Change your attitude.
Long before anyone was advocating the power of gratitude for life’s many privileges, Roman emperor Marcus Aurelius said “ When you arise in the morning, think of what a precious privilege it is to be alive – to breathe, to think, to enjoy, to love.” Look around at the extraordinary amount you have that others might not. You need to show your appreciation for what you have and for those individuals, known and unknown, who sacrificed for you and for generations to come. In the same way that others gave to you, you have to prepare yourself to give back. What gifts, skills, and abilities do you have that you could share to make the world a better place?
2. Say “Thank you.”
Children who are over-coddled or who lacked strong leadership and proper role models grow into adults who approach all of their future challenges and opportunities with a wrong-headed sense of entitlement. Your first step to a more fulfilling life is to thank those who helped you on your journey to success. You owe a debt of gratitude to those who taught you good values, pride in hard work and a job well done, perseverance, and sacrifice for the greater good. Call, write, or speak face-to-face with teachers, coaches, relatives, mentors, and anyone else who made a difference in your life.
3. Be a good example.
Strive to become a person who, in each aspect of your life, helps others to see clearly. Do this by the way you live your life every day, with gratitude and caring for others. Determine who among your family and friends you can help with guidance or assistance, or by sharing some of what you have.
4. Look for role models.
As you seek to serve instead of to get what you deserve, you will find many others who understand the difference between what is their birthright and what is their privilege. You will see that these people contribute to their fellow man and society, feel great about themselves, and use a lot more of their potential. Find these models of service by volunteering for local charities, churches, or community groups. Get involved in your community through local organizations that help those in need.
5. Mentor someone.
Among the many things our mentors can teach us is the difference between rights and opportunities. Unfortunately, not everyone had such guidance and those people inflict themselves on the world as everything from dangerous road ragers who think they own the road to crooked politicians. Find a person who needs guidance, training, and education. Show them the way to better opportunities in life.
6. Give counsel in your company.
Seek out those you work with who might need your help and give them the courage to invest in activities and educational opportunities that will help them on their journey. Teach them the privileges of business: the opportunities to take chances, to innovate, to compete, to create, and to take responsibility for actions.
7. Make the world a better place.
You will find that your own life is suddenly richer, filled with opportunities and rewards. Get involved in political or social issues you feel strongly about, even if that means just signing a petition or calling your Congressperson. In the immortal words of John F. Kennedy, “Ask not what your country can do for you; ask what you can do for your country.”
Give and You’ll Receive Abundance
What goes around comes around. And while we know it’s supposed to be better to give than to receive, many of us have never experienced that on a scale larger than exchanging holiday gifts. Therefore, you might have no sense of how much you get back when you give. When you give back, even in small ways, what you’ll receive as a result of this change in attitude and perspective is guaranteed to defy even your wildest expectations. You’ll discover that when you give more, more opportunities come your way. Actively practice gratitude for your many privileges, and more to be grateful for will flood into your life.
Priviledges from The Respect Factor® Series
THE RESPECT FACTOR® is a trademark of Jack Perry in the United States and other countries. Used with permission. ©2009 Jack Perry. All rights reserved.
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