By Jack Perry
Have you ever heard the saying, “It’s not what you know; it’s who you know”? If you’ve ever been turned down for a job because the other applicant had a friend within the company, or if you’ve lost a sale because your prospect bought from an acquaintance instead of you, then you probably realize the truth behind that statement. Connections make a big impact on success. In fact, in October 2004 Inc. Online published a survey that found forty-four percent of those questioned said family and close friends make a significant difference in getting ahead in business today.
Imagine a computer network. The network connections allow you to access information from other machines. Likewise, your network of friends and acquaintances in other businesses allows you to access opportunities for success and support. A computer network of thousands of machines is better than a network of ten machines. And the larger network of connections you build for yourself, the more opportunities you’ll have.
But connections mean more than just using a relationship to get ahead. The connection system requires constant attention if you want it to work in your favor. Additionally, you have to make sure you’re using your connections for the right reasons; if not, you’ll lose them.
How can you maintain and build a system of connections to increase your success? Consider the following points.
Are You Connected?
A connection is a friend, a club member, a family member, or a relationship of some kind with a person who can help you. Essentially, a connection is an affinity with other individuals. For example, you may have a friend at the newspaper who gives your business publicity whenever possible. Or you may have a sibling at the movie theater who gets you into sneak previews. Your connections help you when needed.
Connections come from virtually anywhere: college, sororities and fraternities, religious affiliations, political groups, country clubs, service organizations, community interest groups, or associations within an industry. You can find valuable connections in a number of places.
Connections reduce the unknown. If someone recommends you to one of his or her connections, then you have a better idea of what you’re going to get. Say you are in the market for a new home and a co-worker suggests you call the real estate agent that found his house. You know your co-worker was satisfied with the results he got from the agent; otherwise he wouldn’t have recommended him. So you can predict that you will be satisfied as well. Working with the agent your co-worker suggested involves less risk than finding an agent in the phone book and gives you predictable result.
Likewise, you can use connections as shortcuts. If you are looking for a new job, you’ll likely start with the companies where you know someone. Your connection will get you past gatekeepers, boost your credibility, and give you a head start over other job seekers. Connections bring about a number of advantages; just don’t take advantage of them.
Check Your Motives
If you take advantage of your connections, you risk losing them. With each connection you have, consider your motives. Why do you maintain a friendship with the gym owner? Do you genuinely enjoy his company, or do you enjoy the discounted membership fees? Why do you send flowers to your property manager every year on her birthday? Do you know how happy it makes her, or do you like the priority parking passes she lets you use? You must maintain your connections for the right reasons; otherwise your actions will be transparent.
Connections should be a byproduct of the things you do anyway. If you want to gain more connections, then you must pay your dues. If you join the Rotary because of all the connections you’ll gain, you must contribute to the group projects. Similarly, you can’t call your friend, the police chief, only when you need a get-out-of-jail-free card. You have to maintain the relationship in order to reap the benefits. If you want people to perceive you as a member of the team, then you have to contribute and help your fellow team members.
To gain connections, join an organization that interests you. But you have to do the legwork and actively participate in the organization. Don’t just join for the connections you’ll make. When people take advantage of the connection system, it becomes transparent. If you think first of what you can take from a connection, then over time it will slow you down.
Maintain Your Connections
How do you maintain your connections without abusing them? The key is to reciprocate favors; don’t take more than you give. If a friend puts in a good word for you with his boss and gets you a job, then take your friend out for dinner, or help him out the next time he needs it. If an acquaintance sends you a new client, don’t hesitate to send business his or her way.
Send handwritten thank-you notes to the people who give you referrals, forward articles of interest to business acquaintances, or just call to say hello. Understand the needs and interests of your connections, and then add value to the relationship with sincere points of contact.
Stay Connected for Your Future
Recognize the fact that people do business with people, not products or companies. And essentially, connections are opportunities. They are relationships that can help you build your business, get your foot in the door, and reduce the risk in your dealings. So don’t abuse your connections. If you take more than you give to a relationship, then your ill intent will come back to hurt you.
Connections take effort to build and maintain. But by establishing a strong network of friends and business acquaintances, you pave a shortcut to success. When you use these strategies to build your personal network of connections, better business opportunities are within your reach. Now go get connected.
Connected from The Respect Factor® Series
THE RESPECT FACTOR® is a trademark of Jack Perry in the United States and other countries. Used with permission. ©2009 Jack Perry. All rights reserved
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